Devotionals / Conflict Resolution
Devotional #128 • 8 min read • May 1, 2025

Making Peace: Biblical Conflict Resolution in Action

Conflict is inevitable, but destruction isn't. Let's learn how to resolve conflicts God's way through practical scenarios.

"Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God." - Matthew 5:9 (KJV)
⚡ Scenario 1: The Church Committee Clash

Tom and Janet, both on the worship committee, strongly disagree about music styles. The tension is affecting the whole team.

Tom (Traditional):
"These modern songs are just noise! We're losing our reverence for God. The hymns have served us well for centuries!"
Janet (Contemporary):
"You're stuck in the past! Young people are leaving because we're not relevant. God deserves fresh expressions of worship!"
Pastor (Mediating):
"I hear both of your hearts for worship. Tom, you value reverence and rich theology. Janet, you want to engage the next generation. What if we explored how both goals could work together?"

Stages of Their Resolution:

1 Tension
2 Eruption
3 Dialogue
4 Understanding
5 Resolution

Biblical Wisdom:

"Let all things be done decently and in order." - 1 Corinthians 14:40

"Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." - Ephesians 4:3

Unity doesn't mean uniformity. We can have different preferences while maintaining the same heart for God.

⚡ Scenario 2: The Family Feud

Siblings arguing over caring for aging parents. Old wounds are resurfacing.

Older Sister:
"You never visit Mom! I'm doing everything while you just send money and think that's enough!"
Younger Brother:
"Easy for you to judge when you live 5 minutes away! I have a job in another state. At least I'm helping financially!"
Older Sister:
"You always were Mom's favorite. Even now, she makes excuses for you!"
Wise Counselor:
"I hear pain from both of you - feeling unappreciated and misunderstood. What if we focused on Mom's needs first, then figured out how you both can contribute according to your situations?"

❌ Wrong Approaches

  • Bringing up past hurts
  • Making accusations
  • Keeping score
  • Silent treatment
  • Involving others to take sides
  • Ultimatums

✅ Right Approaches

  • Focus on current issue
  • Use "I feel" statements
  • Seek understanding
  • Communicate openly
  • Keep it private initially
  • Find win-win solutions

1. Go Directly (Matthew 18:15)

"If thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone..."

Application: Don't gossip or vent to others first. Address the person directly with humility.

2. Listen First (James 1:19)

"Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath"

Application: Seek to understand before being understood. There's usually more to the story.

3. Check Your Heart (Matthew 7:5)

"First cast out the beam out of thine own eye..."

Application: Examine your own contributions to the conflict before pointing fingers.

4. Speak Truth in Love (Ephesians 4:15)

"But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things..."

Application: Be honest but gentle. Truth without love is brutality; love without truth is enabling.

Practical Conflict Resolution Steps:

  • ✓
    Pray First
    Ask God for wisdom, humility, and the right words
  • ✓
    Choose the Right Time & Place
    Not when emotions are high or in public settings
  • ✓
    Start with Affirmation
    "I value our relationship, which is why I want to work through this..."
  • ✓
    Use "I" Statements
    "I felt hurt when..." instead of "You always..."
  • ✓
    Find Common Ground
    Identify shared values and goals
  • ✓
    Create Action Steps
    Agree on specific changes moving forward
⚡ Scenario 3: When Reconciliation Seems Impossible

After repeated attempts, the other person refuses to reconcile.

Your Heart:
"Lord, I've tried everything. They won't even talk to me. I've apologized, but they're still angry. What more can I do?"
God's Word:
"If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men." - Romans 12:18

When Others Won't Reconcile:

  • You're responsible for your actions, not their response
  • Keep the door open while protecting your heart
  • Forgive even without reconciliation
  • Trust God with the outcome
  • Focus on your own growth through the experience
🎯 This Week's Peacemaking Challenge
  1. Identify one unresolved conflict in your life
  2. Pray for the person and situation daily
  3. Write out what you want to say using "I" statements
  4. Take one step toward resolution (call, message, or meet)
  5. Regardless of outcome, thank God for the courage to try
"A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger." - Proverbs 15:1 (KJV)

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