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The Professor Who Found the Professor
Dr. James Harrison's Journey from Atheist Apologist to Christian Scholar
Dr. James Harrison
Ph.D. Philosophy (Oxford) • Former Atheist Debate Champion
Now: Professor of Christian Apologetics, Author of "From Darwin to Design"
"I spent 20 years trying to disprove God. He spent those same years proving Himself to me."
I was raised in the church—pastor's son, actually. But by 14, I'd read enough Dawkins, Hitchens, and Harris to conclude that faith was intellectual suicide. I decided to dedicate my life to freeing others from the "God delusion."
My Intellectual Arsenal by Age 35:
"I was the atheist parents warned their Christian kids about. My lectures dismantled faith with surgical precision. I collected deconversion stories like trophies. If God existed, I reasoned, He'd given me the perfect mind to disprove Him."
The Crusade Against God
My specialty was debating Christian apologists. I'd studied every argument, memorized every logical fallacy, prepared for every possible defense of faith. I was undefeated.
My signature closing statement:
"Faith is believing without evidence. Science is believing because of evidence. Tonight, you've seen which one stands up to scrutiny. Choose reason. Choose reality. Choose to think."
"But something strange happened. The more Christians I debated, the more I noticed something I couldn't explain: joy. Real, substantive joy in the face of my best arguments. They'd lose the debate but win something I couldn't define."
2015: My wife left me. "You love your arguments more than people," she said. Alone in my study, surrounded by books that proved God didn't exist, I felt emptier than the universe I preached.
- Why did consciousness emerge in a materialist universe?
- How did the universe fine-tune itself for life?
- Where did objective moral values originate?
- Why did the disciples die for what they knew was false?
- How did life emerge from non-life against all probability?
- Why do humans universally seek meaning if there is none?
These weren't new questions. I had answers—complicated, convoluted answers that required more faith than... faith.
The Debate That Changed Everything
March 2016: Debating Dr. Sarah Chen, quantum physicist and Christian. I was destroying her arguments about design. Then she said something that shattered my worldview:
"James, you're right. I can't prove God exists. But can you prove love exists? Can you prove beauty exists? Can you prove the very consciousness you're using to deny God exists? Some realities transcend empirical proof."
I won the debate. But lost my certainty.
The Reluctant Investigation
Step 1: Cosmological Evidence
The more I studied the Big Bang, the more it looked like Genesis 1:1. A universe from nothing? That required... a Cause.
Step 2: Biological Complexity
DNA isn't just information—it's a language. Languages require authors. The cell isn't just complex—it's irreducibly so. Darwin couldn't explain what he couldn't see.
Step 3: Historical Jesus
I applied historical methodology to the Gospels. The evidence for the resurrection was... uncomfortably strong. Mass hallucinations don't create worldwide movements.
Step 4: Personal Experience
The hardest evidence to dismiss: transformed lives. Addicts freed. Marriages restored. Joy in suffering. If God wasn't real, His effects certainly were.
The Night I Prayed to Nothing
June 21, 2016. 2 AM. I'd spent months researching. The evidence was mounting. My atheism was crumbling. In desperation, I did something absurd for an atheist—I prayed.
"God, if You're there... I've spent my career calling You a delusion. But if You're real, reveal Yourself. I'll follow the evidence wherever it leads. Even if it leads to You."
No lightning. No voice. Just... peace. And a strange compulsion to read Romans. I opened a Bible for the first time in 20 years.
"For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse."
- Romans 1:20 (KJV)
I'd spent decades studying "the things that are made." Finally, I saw the Maker.
First Prayer
Intellectual Surrender
Public Confession
Baptized
The Academic Earthquake
"Mental breakdown." "Sold out for money." "Was never a real atheist." The attacks were vicious. I lost speaking engagements, book deals, friendships.
"Professor, did you lose your mind?" No, I found it. Along with my soul. Half dropped my class. The other half stayed to watch the train wreck. They got transformation instead.
Suspicious at first. "Is this real?" Time would tell. It has. Now we work together, using reason to defend the faith I once attacked.
Redeeming the Intellect - 8 Years Later
God didn't waste my atheist years. Every argument I crafted against Him, He now uses to strengthen faith. Every debate skill honed in opposition now serves the Gospel.
"From Darwin to Design"
500,000 copies sold, translated into 12 languages
"The Atheist Who Found God"
My testimony, #1 Christian bestseller
"Reason to Believe" Course
100,000+ students, 89% report stronger faith
"Science and Scripture" Podcast
2M downloads, bridging faith and reason
To My Fellow Intellectuals
You think faith requires checking your brain at the door? I thought so too. But I discovered that Christianity doesn't ask you to stop thinking—it asks you to start thinking deeply about the right questions.
The same rigorous methodology I used to attack faith led me to embrace it. The evidence doesn't lead away from God—it leads directly to Him. But evidence alone isn't enough. It takes humility to follow where it leads.
True intelligence isn't just processing information. It's recognizing truth when you find it—even when it challenges everything you thought you knew.
A Prayer for Seekers
"God of all truth, I pray for those reading this who think faith and reason are enemies. Show them, as You showed me, that all truth is Your truth. Give them courage to follow evidence even when it leads to You. Break down intellectual pride and replace it with wonder. You are not threatened by questions—You invite them. Meet these seekers in their seeking. In Jesus' name, Amen."
Today, I still debate. But now I defend what I once attacked. The atheists use my old arguments—I know every weakness. The Christians who once feared me now invite me to strengthen their youth's faith.
My IQ hasn't changed. My degrees are the same. But my worldview? Revolutionized. I didn't lose my mind when I found God—I finally started using it properly.
C.S. Lewis said, "I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else." After 20 years of intellectual darkness, the Son has risen in my life. And finally, I see.
To my former atheist colleagues: I'm still thinking. I just reached a different conclusion. Care to examine the evidence?
